Saturday, November 24, 2007

What the DW is Thankful for!

Hello all it is me Not the Momma again with another days blog for the DW while she travels. Today we will see what the DW is thankful for this Holiday season.

This year the DW is thankful to be alive after her visit to DH. You see DH lives in a far away land where everyone speaks a funny language... No not California someplace farther and a lot friendlier. Yes, I know that is anywhere else other than California, by the way be nice the DW was born there the only thing she has going for her is that you can't choose where you were born, but the very, very, very, did I say very sunny and very, very, one more very HOT place we will call the Island. Some of you might think oh this is DH making up places, just like in his comic books, but I swear to you that this place does exist in the world today. Imagine a land so baron that you can see where the earth curves to meet the sky. This country is also so small that it is the size of Rhode Island.

But I digress we were talking about DW and her wonderful trip to visit DH. Well one day DH comes home and says well I promised you cheep GOLD and today is the day we are going to the souk, (سوق, also sook, souq, or suq) is a highly fashioned caravan. In the modern Arabic the term refers to markets, to find it.

So the DW, DH and Kid load up the car and head out to find the Gold Souk in their rented car. The thing about the Island is that no one follows the driving suggestions. Thats right the DW and myself believe the Island cops just pull people over at what ever time they like. So after driving like a crazed man for about an hour DH believes he has found the right street.

Now you need to understand the map that DH was using was an artists rendition of the streets of the Island. The actual streets were once one lane Camel paths between buildings that someone paved over. And the Islanders, since there are no rules, park on both sides of the road meant to walk Camel carts down. So this leaves inches on each side of DH's rented car. DH is also driving like the locals, remember there are no rules, so he is doing about 60kph down this road where there are inches of room. By the way DH is going to have fun back in the states driving his big blue truck, so if you see a big blue truck you might want to move or DH might pass you on the shoulder doing 80mph.

Ok, DH is driving down this road looking for his turn to take him to the Gold Souk when all of a sudden the street gets smaller and smaller and then out of the blue there is an opening, with a Mosque with about 10 black flags flying around it. Now you see a little explanation needs to happen now. The Island is split into two parts the for US part and the Not for US part. The Not for US part is partitioned with black flags and if you look like you are from the US then you really shouldn't be there especially in the center where the Mosque was located. At this time DH swears silently under his breath knowing that he most likely just killed DW, seeing as DH believes that even carrying Kid he can still out run DW, since she would be over ran by the crowd while DH and Kid got away. Hearing DH swear DW stops looking at all the buildings from "Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom" you know the part where they are running down the street with the girl in the basket, and starts looking at where they are. DH being the dumb@$$ that he is told DW all about the Black flag places and what they represented. Well DW starts saying "that person was staring at me" and "that person was flipping me off". To this day DH does not know how DW seen all these things since everyone was covered head to toe with vales over their eyes.

Any how DH finds the road that will take them from this area and starts driving away at an even faster clip. Finally once clear DH starts making his way back towards the roads that will take them back to the Gold Souk to try again because DH is sure that he knows where he missed his turn. Well that turned out to be just as bad the roads they ended up on this time were even smaller than before and did ninety degree turns around tight corners. By this time DH looks over at DW and sees that she is trying to pull her shirt over face and pull her arms into her shirt. DH laughing asks what she is trying to do an the responce is "I feel naked and these people are judging me because of it"

Once again DH finds his way to a road that looks familiar and starts the long trek back to the road that will take them back to the Souk. DW realizing this states "We do not need to go to the Souk! I am so nervous that my palms are sweating". DH realizing DW is probably right heeds her advice and starts the trek home.

So that is the story about how DW is thankful to be alive.

What did we learn from this? DW learned while in a distant land to have accurate road maps before getting in the car with DH. DH learned that if you want to get out of buying expensive Jewelery for DW drive through the ghetto to get there.

Good night everyone. I hope everyone had a good Thanksgiving and did not get Malled on black Friday.

This is Not the Momma singing off. DW should be back tomorrow to write about her trip.

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