Yesterday's Prompt..

... was completely and utterly fiction.

Yes, I was tempted to take it another way. I had a really hard time not turning it into something, well, X rated. Is that bad that my mind immediately saw the combination of hearth and missile, and went straight to "bow-chicka wow wow?" I'm sure Not the Momma would be proud. (Naomi, you are not alone!)

No, that is NOT how Not the Momma proposed. He was sooooo much more romantic. (ha)

He had been dropping hints left and right that he was going to. We were so happy. It was kind of disgusting, really. Well, I had been wanting to watch some History Channel thing on the Garden of Eden and where it might or might not be today, etc. So, I'm in my room of my apartment, while he's in the Living Room watching something completely different. About 30 minutes into my show:

"Mary, uh. We need to talk. (long pause) Not now! When you're show is over."

Because he loves me and wanted to make sure I got to watch the rest of my show. The last 30 minutes he wouldn't talk to me, and I was unable to concentrate on the show. The only thing going through my mind was that he was about ready to break up with me. I was terrified. Here I had thought I was getting ready to build a life with this guy, and he was going to dump me, and move to some far off land for the Navy. 30 minutes of PURE. TERROR. (So much terror and stress, in fact, that I got a cold sore from it. Nice, huh?)

After the show, I went out to join him on the couch in the living room. "So, you wanted to talk?"

NTM: "Oh, yeah, what are you wearing to Church on Sunday?"

Me: (almost yelling) "That is NOT what you wanted to talk about! No way did you come in there and tell me that you "needed to talk" and you're asking me what (insert expletive) church I'm going to wear on Sunday!"

NTM: "Seriously. Yes. That is what I wanted to talk about. What are you wearing to Church on Sunday?"

Me: "NTM. Stop. It. Tell me what you wanted to talk about because you don't just use the words "we need to talk" and discuss what I'm going to wear to Church!"

(The guy seriously kills me!)

NTM: "Well, I was just wondering what you were going to wear. Because well, um. I figure I've got 20 years left on earth, and I'd like to spend them with you."

It was about at that point that I realized what was going on. He went on about how he didn't actually have the ring. His sister was holding it for him (because the MORON --love you honey! --had hidden it in his truck). He was worried I'd say no if he didn't actually produce a ring right there, but duh, I didn't care. We were engaged.

Now, isn't that romantic? Oh, he wanted to give me the ring in a special way, too, so he wouldn't let me see it at first. Want to know where he hid it? The dirty laundry. Smart, smart man. Who needs a hearth and a missile and a limousine, when you can have "The Talk?"