UPS - Take Notice

HI! How are you? I appreciate that you drive a brown delivery truck and bring me all kinds of goodies! I LOVE it when you show up with your packages wrapped in brown boxes. It feels like Christmas every time -- even though I generally know what's in the box.

So, please forgive me for being frustrated with the fact that you come like a thief in the night. The last three times you have arrived with things we've been waiting for, there has been no knock, no doorbell ring, no nothing. At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if you threw the packages out of the truck as you drove past exceeding our 15 mph speed limit at 35mph.

Forgive me if I'm a bit irritated that a package I've been waiting for sat on my front porch overnight because you came AFTER my husband returned home from work at 5:30 PM and we didn't go anywhere for the evening. I'm glad the package was still there this morning when he left for work.

Please don't be alarmed when, if this should happen again, I contact your company to let them know (as if they'll care) how irritated I am. It has been raining for days and days and days, and you threw my box onto my sopping wet doorstep to sit and soak overnight. All because you were too lazy to put your finger out and ring a doorbell or knock. I don't care if you stick around for coffee and conversation, just ring and go. It's fine. But at least let me know you've been here. So that my books don't end up soaked with 4 day old rain, or the box bottom doesn't fall off when I go to bring it inside, OR so that I can get it off of my front porch before someone else takes off with my child's beloved Pocoyo DVD.

I like you UPS. You bring me nice things. Please tell me when you've been here so that I can like you even more.

The end.