Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Don't be confused if...

... you happen to see us, and my child bounces around yelling "Piss off." he's not really saying piss off. He's saying "BLAST OFF." We don't let our kids watch British shows where people have potty mouths. Or if when he says he's going to get "funky", he forgets about the "n" in the word. At least don't be as confused as I was, and think maybe it was time to lay the smack down in the house about what we're watching on TV, and what we're saying. And don't be surprised when Not the Momma laughs uncontrollably when he realizes why I'm upset and staring at Little Monster as he's repeatedly "blasting off" all over the living room.


...you drive through our neighborhood, which has completely lost power due to winds and rain, and you see my husband sitting on the couch enjoying television on his giant flat panel. Because, friends, that's what generators are for. And extension cords.

...you see me with a giant size 3 diaper wearing baby instead of the teeny (giant) newborn I just brought home. Who knew that babies grew up? Who knew they grew up this fast?

...that tiny newborn actually sits strapped into the grocery cart.

...you see Little Monster pedaling on his bicycle. It happens.

...you call me and you hear lots of yelling. It happens a lot. Especially because the phone only rings when Little Monster has managed to smear poop all over the bathroom, Butterball is crying because she's hungry and wet, and I'm trying to get ready to leave.

...I forget something. Children (even non-nursing ones) have a way of sucking the brain cells right out of their mother's heads until they can barely walk, let alone remember anything.

...you see me online a bit more. I got a new laptop and it is fancy! (That is the major reason for the lack of posting -- I had to get it all up and running!)

...I begin to whine about the cold again. I'm getting ready to go somewhere that is actually cold, instead of pretending to be cold like the area where we live now.

...the sun shines in Coastal Central California. It happens. It also rains here. And we get nasty winds. Once every "hundred years!" Even if it's happened three times in the two we've been here.

...This coming Saturday it rains, even though the weather is supposed to be nice. The only time the weather people are right around here is when they forecast a temperature range of 45 to 65, partly cloudy and a chance of fog, or if the storm of the century is coming.

2 comments:

Steven, Diana, Caden & Baby said...

Thanks for the blog update...I needed it ; ) You keep me sane!!

Vanessa said...

A few things to share, so you know you aren't alone. :) We went through a phase where everything was "stuck." Strapped in a carseat, yelling stuck, strapped in a high chair yelling stuck, strapped in a shopping cart yelling stuck. Did I mention that the "st" in stuck was pronounced with an "f"? I got LOTS of dirty looks during that phase, and spent a lot of time walking around the grocery store saying "you aren't stuck, you're strapped in" loudly so other people might get that he wasn't just swearing up a storm.

Butterball is in 3's? Holy giantatic baby, Elli is only in 2-3 size! (But we are ready to move up to 3's as soon as this box is gone.)