Yes. I'm still pregnant. I plan on remaining that way forever. That way I can torture my husband by making him do all of the cleaning and laundry. And because it gives me something to complain about.
My stomach now sticks out as far as my entire forearm. The muscles that support it are starting to flip me off. Daily and nightly. It used to be just nightly but now they've decided to take turns during the day shift as well.
Everyone seems very concerned when they see me. But that's just because if you walk up to me from behind you don't notice, then when I turn to the side, my body suddenly quadruples in size. That, and if my stomach is this big, how big is the child? We have an ultrasound scheduled for Monday to find out. I am praying that because I scheduled that ultrasound I won't need it.
The other day we were walking somewhere, and I didn't realize that my belly was sticking out of my pants and my shirt was riding high. I realized when I got home and looked in the mirror why everyone I met gave me a silly smile. You could see the pants were falling off. That was a great day. Most of my clothing fails to meet standards these days. So, I sit in my house in my husband's undershirts and old pajama bottoms waiting.
Little Monster is growing LEAPS and BOUNDS these days. He is finally expressing some interest in potty training. He'll tell us immediately after he goes #1 that he's done it. Then, he wants to sit on the toilet for the congratulatory chocolate. The problem is, as he puts it:
"Mommy! Pee all gone! There's no pee left."
This, after squinting, grunting and trying to eek out just a dribble. He knows that if there is not tinkle, there is no treat.
He's also decided that driving me crazy isn't good enough.
Me: "You're driving me crazy today!"
LM: "No! I driving you NUTS!"
Not the Momma is amazing. He has taken charge of not only studying for finals and getting the last minute things out of the way for him at work so he can be here when the baby comes, but he's taken care of most of the last minute things around the house as well. And he's been cleaning. And cooking. Real meals. I know. Last night, the man even ate leftovers, which is something he doesn't do.
What can I say? I have a few things left to do before the baby comes. But I'm hoping that by leaving them undone that I'll have to do them while in labor before we leave for the hospital. At this rate, the guest bed will have sheets on it sometime in 2011.
The newest member of our family: Shortcake.
