Thursday, February 19, 2009

Dr. Internet -- You scare me.

Worse than the 10:00 AM arrival and hug of my 2 year old son accompanied by a warning about the imminent danger of hostile robots.

I simply looked up how long I should be suffering from this very nasty sinus infection before I need to see a doctor to find out that I could die. My sinuses could swell into my brain or something, cause my eyeballs to fall out of my head after dilating my pupils, making me go blind and then killing me.

Don't believe me?

If left undiagnosed and untreated complications of
sinusitis can occur that may lead to severe medical problems and possibly
death. the following complications are medical emergencies and require
immediate treatment in a hospital's emergency department:

  • Headache, fever, and soft tissue swelling over the frontal
    sinus may indicate an infection of the frontal bone called Pott's puffy tumor or
    osteomyelitis. Usually this complication is limited to
    children.
  • Infection of the eye socket may result from ethmoid
    sinusitis. The eyelid may swell and become droopy. Fever and severe illness are
    usually present. A person with this infection may lose the ability to move the
    eye, and permanent blindness may result.
  • Ethmoid or frontal sinusitis may also cause the formation
    of a blood clot in the sinus area around the front and top of the face. Symptoms
    may be similar to those of eye socket infection with the addition of a fixed and
    dilated pupil. This condition usually affects both sides of the
    face.
  • If a person experiences mild personality changes, headache,
    neck stiffness, high fever, altered consciousness, visual problems, or seizures,
    infection may have spread to the brain. Coma and even death may
    follow.

In other words, I probably should update my will. And talk to my husband about my dying wishes while kissing and smothering Little Monster with love. And chocolate. I could go into a coma at any second. OR I COULD DIE. But then again, maybe I should just take some more Tylenol and call my Doctor if it doesn't go away by next week.

(Italicized text above taken from here.)

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

WARNING!

At 10:00 AM every morning this week, Little Monster has given me a warning about the robots coming. It creeps me out just a little bit. Mostly because it's the same comment, the same time of day, and he hugs me while he says it. It's also partly because I've warped my brain with scary movies that starred children. Like Signs. And Poltergeist. All I know is if he ever says "They're hee-eerre" or "it's contaminated," I'm heading for the hills. As long as there's a lake nearby.

Maybe we've watched a little too much Chicken Little and Meet the Robinson's lately? Could it be that I'm warping his sense of reality? We only watch animated things with him, mostly because I want him to be able to have some sort of grasp of the difference between "pretend" and "real" before I expose him to too many live-action things.

Until we get this figured out, I'd bet that I'll continue to get my 10:00 AM warning and hug:
"Mommy. Robots coming."

Did your kids ever say creepy things like that on a regular basis?

Should I be worried about a Terminator-type invasion? Only time will tell.

Past Fat.

For a long time, I was in that "maybe she's just gained a few pounds" stage of pregnancy. And for a long time I lamented the fact that unless I was wearing a maternity shirt, I really did look a little overweight rather than pregnant.

Folks, for a few weeks, I've been past the fat part and now, I look PREGNANT. You've seen the pictures from the past few weeks. That's not fat. That's baby. A LOT of baby. Let the comments begin!

I ran into someone today who looked at me, gave me a knowing smile and said "How much longer?" thinking I had a month, maybe a few weeks left until this little parasite (whom I dearly love already and am grateful to have) decides to evacuate my body. It took three people to pick her jaw up off of the floor when I told her I wasn't due until June. I am one of those people who get heavily pregnant. I don't get 'heavy' by gaining weight anywhere else. Just the belly. Last time I was pregnant, at around 7 months I went into the hospital to visit a family member and every person on staff tried to herd me to the Labor & Delivery floor. I am not at all like my dear friend G (congratulations!) who just gave birth to her little boy. She, was cute and tiny in every way. And still wearing normal pants, whereas I gave up normal pants ages ago.

I'm already big enough that scrubbing the bathtub is uncomfortable and I can't bend over from a sitting position to pick things up off of the floor. Okay, I can, but not without feeling like something inside me is going to burst. Take this as your warning for future Foto Fridays of the pregnant lady. If I put up the compare pics, you'll notice that the last time I didn't much worry about covering my belly. This time it will be different. I promise. It's for your own protection.

Tuesday, February 17, 2009

As if you couldn't get enough...

This morning we visited my OB for the regular monthly checkup. We did it without Daddy coming along, which, with a sinus infection and massive headache wasn't fun.

On the way home, I explained to Little Monster that I was sick, so I wanted to have a quiet afternoon at home. I got this response:

"Mommy Sick. Mommy go Doctor. Mommy Broken."

Luckily I didn't crash the car with the fit of laughter that followed.

Monday, February 16, 2009

My Daily Laugh

Scene: Me, being a bad mommy by ignoring my child and playing on the Internet while he runs around with his big trucks. Daddy is upstairs working on a test that goes on forever.

Little Monster crawls under the dining room table with his cars, and there is a sound of 'gas escaping' from his rear end.

Me: Did you fart?
LM: No!
Me: Are you poopy?
LM: No!
Me: Are you sure you didn't fart?
LM: No. Daddy!
Me: Daddy did it?
LM: Yeah! Daddy Poopy!! Daddy Poop!